Happy Thanksgiving (a day late)

I managed to not only lose 1.2 lbs since last week (still not at my low since surgery yet) but I also went to the gym today and doubled up on my training sessions!!!  I managed a whopping FIVE sessions at the gym this week.  I feel great about that and HELLO, that might have something to do with the loss this week :)  I dig it, I do. :D

Had a fabulous time yesterday for sure.  Ate my fair share of food (and yours, I'm sure) I won't lie but I worked my booty off at the gym today so I don't even feel the slightest bit guilty!  Not gonna stress about that AT ALL.  Why bother.. what's done is done! :)  You can only move forward.

We got our tree up today and some other small decorations.  We need to get to the hardware store tomorrow for some nails for some other things but I'm loving how it just fills up my home!  Makes it so festive and happy.  Not to mention the kiddo loves it all!

Got a bunch of online shopping done this evening.  Didn't take advantage of many really huge sales but got the kiddo completely taken care of and I also bought for the hubby.  I warned him he can't read the packing slip or he dies.  I even went so far as to have his gift wrapped so he can't see it that way either!  I'm excited :)  I asked the fam for a bunch of new winter clothes.  I'm a bit scarce on them! 

Speaking of clothes... my band buddy Tracy hooked me up once again!  She sent me a package of 3 sweaters recently and I actually wore one of them yesterday for Thanksgiving! :)  It was an XL Ralph Lauren sweater, hooded with front pockets.  It was soooo soft (rabbit hair) and I wore a black cami under it and it was perfect!  The other two were lighter weight solid color sweaters.  Both XL and I believe both Gap.  They both fit gloriously! :) So happy to be in these "normal" sizes. :) :) :)

I rescheduled my fill for this coming Tuesday.  I also see the nutritionist for my 6 month visit (a month late since she had to reschedule my actual appt) on Monday so I'll be a busy appt girl this week.  I'm anxious to see what everyone has to say!!! 

Well, that's about all the updates.  I'll try and get some pictures of the holiday decor around my house and post those soon. 

Lots of love!

BLECH!

Soooooooooooooo.  It turns out Chris decided to pass a kidney stone through his system today right around the time I was getting ready to leave for a fill.  In case anyone doesn't know... stones are comparable to child birth apparently in pain.  I had to drive the man to the ER and cancel my fill.  I'm going to call tomorrow to try and reschedule for asap (maybe tomorrow??) and get that taken care of.

The good news is the man must have passed his stone through to his bladder since his sever pain stopped.  They sent him home with a script for Vicodin and told him to strain his pee to hopefully catch the culprit and have it analyzed to see why he got it in the first place. 

So that's that.  No fill for me today.

Haircut, baby hairs, fills, oh my!

Well, where to start?!  I guess first of all, today is my fill at 3:45.  I plan on really talking to the NP and asking her to be generous and let me deal if I'm too tight (not *really* but to give me more than .4 this time).  I've never BEEN too tight so it's just hard to see that happening to me if that makes any sense.  I sort of want it to happen to know that it CAN happen!  That there's a green zone for me coming.

Yesterday, I ran into the salon and got a quick trim.  Well, I suppose I scheduled it but she happened to have an opening yesterday so I scooped it up!  I went at 4 and her next appt wasn't until 5 so she curled and styled my hair for free in between!  Sweet!  Here's a shot I captured on my laptop webcam.. so not that great.  I also took it about 2-3 hours after so it was a bit flatter than it started.  She knows I like volume so she always gives me big hair :D hehe.

Don't you just LOVE my wallpaper too?  And the sleeping kitty?  That's Rocky!  This is where I normally sit while I'm blogging or on my laptop.  The wallpaper has been here since before we bought the house and we've just not been troubled to take it down...even though we despise it.  Sigh... it will wait.

Some good news.. :)  As my stylist was cutting my hair she pointed out all the little baby hairs sticking straight up from the top middle of my head!  YAY!  My hair is growing back! :)  I'd noticed that it stopped falling out but didn't notice these baby hairs until she pointed them out.  Well, darn it if I couldn't stop talking about them after that LOL.  I was so excited! :)

I'm growing my hair long for my BFF's wedding in May so I have something to style for the big day, lol.  Otherwise I usually cut my hair pretty short or at least a bit different each time.  This was just a trim :)

I'll report back in once I know what I got for a fill!  I work tonight so maybe after work or tomorrow :)

Troubled

I can handle a lot, I really can.  However, I just looked at my weight excel spread sheet to see when the first time was that I got into this tens bracket.  It was July 1... JULY!  I have been struggling with this same 10 pounds.. HELL the same FIVE pounds since JULY!  I weighed in at 217.2 this morning which is down from last week but up from my lowest weight.  On July 1st, I weighed 220.0.  Suckdog.

So... to not let this get me down TOO much, I called and made an appt for a fill and what do you know they got me in on TUESDAY!  YAY!!!  I'm really going to lay it out there and tell the NP all of this.  Tell her I have about 5 more months of "free" fills in my self-pay package and I'm sick of weighing the same thing.  I'm going to tell her to be aggressive and give me a freaking FILL and not a fill.  I obviously need some more help unless I'm just one of those people that the band doesn't work for.  I don't believe this to be true since I'm maintaining my weight and DO feel some restriction.  Things are definitely different in how I eat as well.  I eat MUCH slower and have to do so or I feel like I'm stuck for a bit.  I get the hiccups if I stop thinking for a minute and take a drink too quickly after a bite of food (I have fessed up to taking one or two drinks (sips) while I eat).  There are a lot of things!  I am hardly ever hungry and that is GREAT!  I just need some help with my food quantity and that means I need a FILL!  Please!

I'm going to admit to being excited to be getting a fill before Thanksgiving too so I don't have the ability to pig out.  I was a bit worried about my will power on turkey day!

That's that.  I'm gonna get a fill and assume that's the only problem so I don't give myself an aneurysm and just keep truckin' along!

Happy Friday to you all!

Sarah's Bandster Quiz

1. How long have you been banded? 6 1/2 months
   
2. What was your highest pre-band weight? / Current weight now? / Total lost to date? 256 lbs not pregnant, pregnancy high was somewhere around 275 lbs/ 215 ish/ 30 ish
   
3. What is your best "go-to" food to get in your protein? Cottage Cheese for sure!
   
4. What is your favorite protein brand/shake? Haven't found one that fits the bill quite yet!
   
5. What food do you miss the most now being post-band? I am a "lucky" bandster and haven't found anything that disagrees with my band or me.
   
6. What is your favorite "mushy" food? Mashed potatoes saved my mushy life!
   
7. What was your worst PB experience? I've had only one to date so I guess it was the "worst."  Ate breakfast, followed it almost immediately with a small bag of doritos and up the chips came.  Nothing too terrible if you ask me...
   
8. What has been the hardest part of this journey so far for you? Probably not reaching that perfect restriction spot yet.  I'm self-pay and $330 per fill is hard to swallow after my first year so let's hope I get there SOON!
   
9. What is your best NSV to date? Definitely shopping in "regular" stores!!  Buying a "regular" winter coat this year!!!!
   
10. What is your top non-weight goal for your band? (top NSV maybe?) I'd like to get rid of, or reduce the amount of pills I take for, my diabetes.
    
11. What is your goal weight or size? Not sure on weight... size 10 sounds appealing to me though.
    
12. What band "rule" do you live by (i.e. don't cheat on)? I, like Sarah, have not had ANY soda since the psychologist told me to stop pre-surgery.
    
13. What band "rule" do you not follow as much or aren't so good at? I take the occasional sip of water/milk with dinner.  I have to be careful or I give myself the hiccups if I drink too closely after a bite but I like to clean my palate.
    
14. What is your goal "reward"? I have not thought of this.. it just might be plastic surgery though, too.  Tummy tuck, arm lift, boob lift... maybe more if needed.
    
15. In the spirit of Thanksgiving being right around the corner (US), what are you most thankful for, post-band? I am most thankful for my family who has supported me through every step of this process. :) <3
    

Good gravy

*sigh*

Last week I was up 3 lbs or something... during the week I got 1 lb away from my low and thought woohoo, I'm gonna do this.  Then today comes... weigh day.  Yeah... yippee... not so much.  I'm up ANOTHER POUND from LAST week!  WTF!?  Maybe it is just water weight I suppose but dang... where did THAT come from.  I should be used to my weight fluctuating like this but it still hurts a bit LOL.

It'll go away quickly... I'll make it.

Saturday, 11/7, College Roomie's Wedding!!

Saturday was another super busy day!  We had guests for brunch on Sunday morning so we needed to prep the food and have it in the fridge overnight.  Well, with a wedding in the evening we knew we had to get creative.  We prepped everything and had both egg mixtures in the fridge and just poured them at the last minute when we got home from the wedding.  So we spent the late morning/early afternoon doing prep work and cleaning up the house.

Our wedding was 2 hours north of here in Appleton.  We opted to skip the ceremony.  We NEVER do this because it's RUDE but we did this time because we didn't stay over anywhere and had nothing to do for the 2-4 hours between the ceremony and the dinner.  There was an appetizers and cocktail hour that we did wind up attending as well but that was 2 hours of more waiting around... we wound up glad we skipped the ceremony.

Had a great dinner and cake and saw another of my roommates and two other people I knew from college as well.  It was very nice!!  Cadence LOVED it all.  She wanted to invite the "girl in the white dress" to her birthday party, haha.  She stared at her while she danced with her husband and then her father.  She always wanted to know where she was.  We ducked out at 9 pm to be home by 11 pm and mixed up our breakfast dishes and hit the hay!

Now on to the part that everyone loves... pictures!

ALLLLLL byyyy myself

Me (unflattering pose apparently.. blech!) with Nicole, my first college friend and sophomore roommate!

Me (in unflattering pose), Nicole, Stephanie - 2 of the 3 roomies sophomore year.

Chris and me :)  Cute, no?

Friday, 11/6, Fluoroscopy

I think I'll try and get a few different posts in today since I had a different activity, with photos, on Saturday and Sunday as well.  So, before I have to leave for dance class (for the kiddo)... here it is!

Friday I went to the hospital for my fluoro.  I was going to have a couple things looked at and possibly a fill.  So the NP comes in with me and they get me all set against the table, standing up.  The radiologist took a few pictures to make sure she was lined up properly and once I was we looked at my insides... it was much like Catherine's photo on her blog actually... you can see it here.  The NP explained that my band was in the right place and at the right angle.  She pointed to my port and my upper and lower stomach(s?).  I breathed a small sigh of relief just knowing my band was where it should be.

Then they handed me that cup of stuff.  Thick... white... fruity-tasting... not bad at all!  I told them it was almost good and they all snapped their heads and said "NO ONE has ever said THAT!"  LOL Leave that to me, I guess.  It's not what I want to be drinking on a daily basis but it was NOT what I expected at all.  So anyways... the contrast (barium) wasn't bad.  I took some into my mouth and when the radiologist told me to, I swallowed.  Then we all watched on the screen and saw it go down.  Here's what it was like... WHOOSH!  LOL.  Yeah... so the NP was like, "you need a fill."  My response was, "ya think?"  There was no reflux (another thing she was checking for) which is great and I just need a bit more help getting my stoma smaller.

So then she proceeds to try to give me a fill while standing so they don't have to lower the bed back down (remember, I'm leaning against the bed, standing up).  I raised my arms above my head and she went at it.  The pricks don't hurt me at all so I don't ever get lidocaine.  The scraping against my plastic port is what drives me up the wall.  She missed... and I started to get clammy instantly.  I was sweating and gritting my teeth.  The radiologist was asking me if I was ok over and over.  The NP then decided to try it laying down after all but the rad. didn't want to let me off the bed for fear of me passing out so she lowered the bed with me on it!  FUN!  I said, "Whee, this must be what space camp is like!"  LMAO, wtf, Tiff??

So I'm laying down and she restabs me to try to hit the port again and again no dice.  One more stab and still no dice.  She was talking about paging the surgeon at that point but the rad. took a picture and the NP was able to see where the needle was in comparison to my port and she made it in!  She gave me a small fill and then, with needle still in, they stood me back up.  They handed me the cup and watched it go down again.  WHOOSH!  Now, I'm not a rad. or an NP so I couldn't really tell wtf it was supposed to look like.  This is liquid after all.  So she says, you need a bit more and added some more.  Again, swallow, whoosh, repeat.  This time however she said it looked good and we pulled the needle out and it was over.  She explained what she saw though was that it went in, hung up above the band a moment and then went through... just what you want to see.  So off I went after they insisted I sit down and breathe a bit.  I explained I was fine and it was just the grinding, bone-scraping feeling inside that I hate.  She said she understood since it is a part of me now.

Anyways, sorry if that was long-winded.  I wanted to outline what happens in case someone else needs/wants to get one.  Not scary at all, not any more painful than a normal fill.

So moral of the story:  I'm 6 mos out of surgery and I still might need a few more fills.  I'm perfectly normal!  It's ok if I go overfull a bit.  You don't actually ever know what's in your band because even if you pull it all out at each fill you can't ever get it ALL out.  I could have gotten a sub-cutaneous fill at some point and my fill count could be off.. you just never know.

So that's it, ladies!  No problems/complications for me! (yet.. knock on wood)

Sweet Pumpernickle!!!!

Dear gawd, I gained 3 lbs in a week.  Freakin' Halloween candy... good thing I ate it all so it can no longer taunt me.

Getting my fill under fluoro this afternoon!!!  I will hopefully be back sometime this weekend to post about it but we have a BUSY weekend ahead again.  A wedding tomorrow which is 2 hours away.  Then Sunday is Cadence's birthday and we have several different activities planned for that! :)  YAY!

Have a great Friday and a great weekend all!  Back on the wagon I go!

A few different things to say

I wanted to thank you all for your kind words on the "anniversary" of my mom's death.  You really managed to make me smile and I appreciate that.  I smiled through the tears thinking of how happy and proud for me she must feel.  At least that's what I hope!!

Also, the guy that killed her... I don't know too much about him because I was so young and my dad doesn't talk about it a whole lot.  I do know that he went into a mental institution for a while and was released.  That's what happened to 17 y/o's who wanted to kill themselves  at that point in time.  His name is David Braun so he has a VERY common name and I've looked him up before but there are tons of people with his name so he could be anywhere, doing anything... or he could be dead.  I have no clue and I, honestly, no longer care.  For a long time I wanted to punch the guy in the face or something.. just something.  I'm long over that.

--------------------------------------------

On a completely different note! :)

I went to the gym this morning for my cardio session with my trainer.  We do 20 minutes every Tuesday and are going to be bumping that up to 2-3 times a week and just 1-2 strength sessions instead of 3 strength, 1 cardio.  I need the cardio at this point so I've gotta change things up.  Anyways... in the beginning of training, a few months back, I was lucky to get to one mile during my session.  It slowly went up each week and our goal was always to get a little farther than the previous week.  Last two weeks have been right around 1.25 miles.  Well, this week I got to 1.3 miles and BOY did it feel great!  We started jogging at around 5 minutes in and before that we were doing a fast walk.  I've never started running so soon in the session either.... man.. it just felt good all around :)

Well, I posted about it on facebook this morning and darn it if one person didn't tell me that I inspired them to work out today!  THEN, another friend chatted me up on facebook and said she was inspired too and was going to go change and work out right then!  And then she changed her facebook status to thank me for inspiring her!!!  She spelled my name wrong (dammit) but I won't fault her too much for that.  I'll blame my dad... he named me.

I'll leave you with a photo of my bambino in her Halloween costume at dance last week.  This is how she was supposed to look on Halloween too but it was too cold and she had to wear a coat under her costume and she wound up looking like a chubby version of this ;) LOL.  She's a "midnight fairy" so says the costume packaging.

Oh and the hubby did her makeup! Love him!!

One busy week down... another left to go!

Last week was a bit chaotic for me in this house.  My parents came to stay the night on Friday and I was feeling like a chicken with my head cut off trying to clean and get ready for them to come.  They have only stayed the night at our house one other time.. when my kiddo was born almost 5 years ago now.  Otherwise they stopped at our house on a tour de Christmas one year when they stopped at all their older kids' homes.  So yeah, busy!!!

I managed to pull everything off though and I was happy with our mini-visit!  I had suggested making dinner and all my ideas were tossed out the window because my little brother (he still lives at home and goes to college) is lactose intolerant.  My mom suggested KFC for dinner since they don't have one by them.  Done.  They even bought.  Soooo, I made breakfast instead!  I made two different casseroles/bakes.  One was an egg and sausage dish and the other was a french toast with pecans and blueberries dish.  Both turned out great and everyone went away full and happy! :)  Success!  I didn't say they were healthy but they impressed the fam!

I'm making them again this coming Sunday morning.  Sunday is my kiddo's 5th birthday and I'm having the inlaws over for brunch.  I'll do these two dishes, fruit and MIL (mother-in-law) is bringing pumpkin muffins.  Of course, we'll also have some sort of birthday cake.. maybe coffee cake or something since her official party is at 1 that afternoon and we'll be doing cake there.

Her kid/official party is at 1-3 at Animart.  A few of her closest friends will be there and they'll get a tour of the pet store and then there will be a pinata and cake and presents.  Good times.  It will be a crazy weekend though, yet again.  Not to mention the wedding we're attending on Saturday that is 2+ hours away.  It's my college roommate and I don't want to miss it though so we'll make do. :)


OK on to band news!!

I got a phone call from the NP this morning and I have a fluoro scheduled!!!  I am going in THIS Friday at 2 pm!!!  I am sooo excited!  Either I'm going to find out something is wrong or I'm going to get a fill and both excite me... even the problem part.  If there's a problem, at least I'll know and can take steps to fix it. 

A question for all of you...

Anyone ever heard of a pressure fill?  The girl I "met" on LBT that has the same issue I have (can eat anything, no pb's, same band, needed to be overfilled to get to the green zone) said her doctor performed a "pressure fill" on her and had some sort of gauge on the fill needle and filled her to a good pressure instead of going by the number of cc's in her band.  I mentioned this to the NP and she hadn't heard of it.  I asked her to look into it but she hasn't mentioned it.  I'm just wondering if I should be asking for something more specific.. maybe I'm not using the right terminology??  So if anyone knows anything, I'd be very appreciative.

Off to get some laundry done for the week! 

Quick Post :)

This afternoon Chris and I spent some time outside raking the yard and leaf blowing.  While we were lugging the tarp full of leaves around to the front of the house I mentioned that my pants kept needing to be pulled up.  I said, "When I was fat I never had this issue."  Chris just hmphed and then I said, "Wait, did you hear what I just said?  That first part??!!  WHEN I was fat!" 

It was then that I realized a small part of my brain thinks I'm no longer fat!!!  What a great victory!!!  I will eventually win over all of my brain and oh what a happy world I will live in!!

Oh and... what a workout raking is!!  Whew!!