When my mom was 24 she had 3 young kids at home. My brother was 5, sister 3 and me, 13 mos. She sold toys at those home parties as a side job and was out doing that one night. Another kid, 16 years old, was driving the opposite direction and had already decided to commit suicide. How did he choose to kill himself? Well, he drove head-on into my mom's car. My mom died, of course. He suffered a "possible" broken nose. Really, POSSIBLE! That's it. I don't generally wish harm on people but he was the one that wanted to die, not my mom.
So that's that :(
Thing is... being a parent and wife now makes things totally different. I think of how my dad must have felt when he was told his wife was gone. He got a phone call to come to the hospital "right away" and they told him when he got there, after he dropped us kids off with his parents (I think, I only know these details from stories other people told). I think of how *I* must have felt when all I wanted was my mom and she never came back (even though I know, as a baby, I really didn't care for long). It's rough. It makes me cry today to think of it. I think of what SHE is missing out on as a parent, grandparent, and wife. I think of what MY daughter is missing out on from her being her grandma.
We looked a lot alike too, my mom and I. My older sister is blonde and blue-eyed. I am my mom's twin with more of her Japanese features... dark hair and eyes, and our body shape is similar as well. I wish I had more pictures scanned in to show you guys... let's see if I can dig at least one up to share. All of the pics I tried to share "failed" to upload! Grr!!! I'll try again in another blog. It's comforting knowing I look like her... I don't know why but it is.
Anyways, today and every day I miss my mom. I know she'd be proud of me though and I know we'd be best of friends if she were still here. Oh man, here come the water works again! I'm such a sappy mess. I do, however, believe that I will see her one day. I'm excited for that day :) (but it can wait!).
Mom and Dad on their wedding day :)
I see myself in this shot... I can picture a goofy side of her here!