Rockin' it Out!

Friday, December 4, 2009

Pysch Visit

Yesterday, I had a visit with a wonderful health psychologist.  I spent an hour laying it all out there and man did that feel good.  He listened for a good, long time and then asked some questions.  After he was done listening he drew the above diagram.  It's called Transactional Analysis.  He said it's old but so is he, hehe.  I could actually really relate to what he told me with this!  Basically, when I'm all "I want that candy and no one can stop me" it's acting in my child state.  When I'm rational and think it through like, "I don't need that candy cuz it's gonna go straight to my ass" that's my adult state.  And, when Chris is all, "you can't have that candy because you told me to stop you..." that's him being my parent and I hate it! LOL!

This is a public blog so let's face it... my parents have the potential to come across it.  So I'm not going to spill all my baggage out there but, basically, I was a REALLY good kid and I had a VERY strict step-mom.  I think she'd admit to that much, I hope.  I never did drugs, never drank, never partied.

In the opinion of EVERY psychologist I've seen for any reason they've all told me that I grew up too quickly.  The psych yesterday thinks I am nurturing the child state of me because I didn't get enough time to be completely in the child state.  If I'm twisting his words around a bit you'll have to forgive me because there was a LOT of information to take in during our session.  So he suggested I try to nurture my child state in different ways than food.  Think about it... what are one of the ways you nurture a child?  You feed it.  I feed my child state a wee bit too much and too often! :)  He suggested I try to figure out what my child state needs.  This could be done on my own by journaling (helloooo blog world) or by seeking professional help.  He, being a psychologist himself, of course recommends that I see someone.  I agree with him but just don't know where I will fit it into my schedule.

I told him something he really liked too.  I told him I was worth the time and money (if it costs and isn't covered by insurance) to take care of myself.  I've already spent a LOT of money to get this band so why wouldn't I take whatever necessary steps to further help myself since it appears I need it?!  I will NOT fail myself OR this band.  I refuse.

Ahhhh.  You gotta love a good psychologist session! :)  You know what else I love?  My blog ladies!  You were all SO supportive of my last post and I had tears with each comment that came in.  I am SO thankful!


  1. Great post! Maybe you need to do some fun child like activities? Ice Skating, carnival rides etc!

  2. Im sooo very glad that you got some good information out of this and now know what you need to do! I know in the beginning when I was soooo hungry and could not eat I would make Hairbows for my daughter, I went out and bought a whole bunch of ribbion and a glue gun and clips and made her a ton of bows. it was my way of distracting myself so I would not think about eating, so now she has a massive amount of bows that match every outfit! lol.

  3. It's really good when we can trace back a problem we find in adulthood and actually realise there is a reason for it. He sounds like a lovely man - and very smart.
    Love the little kitten pic - so cute.

  4. Thanks for this post! You know, I have realized that at a young age I learned to soothe myself with food, but I had not realized that today I am trying to soothe my child self. That is so it! I too grew up too fast and was always so "mature" ha. Deep inside is a little girl that still thinks she needs food to feel good. It is so simple really that it's kinda funny. Thanks for sharing! I am going to do a lot of thinking on this one.

  5. Thank you for sharing this. So...are you supposed to nuture your child self in other ways? Bc I do. I play make believe all the time! ANd I still feed my child self. Maybe it is different for me. It sounds like a start though!

  6. Making headway! Keep on truckin'! Good work.